I haven’t had as godly attitudes these past couple of days. Care giving has gotten to me. And this morning as I felt more surrendered, I realized that when I get like “that,” and try to move out of it, I’m not throwing myself at Jesus’ feet, I’m just trying to muster the good attitude on my own. Of course, it’s a mixture as for most of us, not completely one way or the other, because I am seeking God. It’s just as I look back, I can see more clearly that most of it is trying to talk myself into a good attitude rather than being desperate for God. Saying, “I can’t do this, help me. I’m totally dependent on you, Father. You do it in me.” It’s really gotta be His grace.
I need to think more about this and try to clarify this. Plus, I think a book I read recently talks more about this, so I’ll get back to you.