As I talk to women at parenting seminars or at women retreats, when I suggest something like a discipline technique to train their child or a “make marriage better” idea, I frequently hear, “I tried that, it doesn’t work.” When we try something to make things better, we can easily give up. We try several times or even a long time, when it doesn’t “work,” we give up.
If we have the attitude that I’m trying something in order to control the situation, we have to evaluate our motives. This is especially true with marriage “techniques.” We often are trying to change someone else to be the way we want them to be. As a result, we quickly give up because the other person didn’t change and make our lives better.
This reveals a wrong motive. Our motive should be to do the right thing regardless of the result because we have our eyes on Jesus and we want to please Him. If we’re doing the right thing without the result we crave, we know God is pleased. When we have that kind of motive and attitude, we will “not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap, if we do not grow weary.” (Gal 6:9 NASB). (Corrected verse number, thank you, Kathy, for pointing out my error).
Are you discouraged today because your efforts aren’t getting what you want? Maybe you are convinced you must have some change in the other person in order for you to have peace and contentment. Look honestly at your heart. Trying to change or control someone else is God’s job. Don’t take it upon yourself. Obey God and leave the results to Him. He promises that you will reap. I don’t think that means you’ll always reap what you want but for sure you’ll reap God’s pleasure and a peace and joy that comes from focusing on Him.