DRUM ROLL!!! The winner of the drawing for my book, Never Ever Be the Same is … (wait for it!)…Mona! Thanks so much for putting your  name in the drawing, Mona. God bless you! Please send your mailing address to me: KathyCollardMiller AT gmail DOT com.

As I shared with you in my last post, my weeks in bed because of mono and then a gradual strengthening over nine months taught me a lot. I was reminded again of where my value and worth come from. Paul’s words say it all: all he had accomplished “for God” was “a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord” (Philippians 3:7-8).

Paul’s use of the word “count” has the sense of “evaluate or assess.” Paul evaluated everything he had before Christ and everything he gained through knowing Christ, and he could say without a doubt that the present knowledge of Christ was far superior. In fact, he considers everything from “B.C.” rubbish! That strong word is the same as “excrement, food thrown away which is useless and actually contaminating and harmful.”

I think it’s significant that his words in Philippians were penned thirty years after his Damascus road experience. We’re not talking about new convert excitement and commitment here. Paul remembers what his earthly perspective involved, and yet through thirty years of “evaluating,” he confirmed that Christ offers the best!

I look back on my season of mono and “being still and knowing God” (Psalm 46:10) and consider it a precious experience of deepening my intimacy with Him through silence and inactivity. I am encouraged to know that the important thing in life is to focus not on my accomplishments, but on my inheritance in Christ as a princess of the King. 

Of course, I don’t always remember this! I often still regard certain things as the source of my value and significance. 

Like now. I’m in a new season of less activity and being strengthened by remembering that time of mono. This past March 30, I had a grand mal seizure. Thankfully, nothing like a tumor or possible other cause was found but unfortunately, the only solution for preventing further seizures is to take anti-seizure medicines.  Their side effect makes me feel more tired. 

Therefore, I’m back to having to remember that my value isn’t what I accomplish in a day but my value in Christ. Even when I take a nap, God still loves me just as much as if I were “ministering” in some way! And He loves me just as much even if I am too tired to do anything! I’m grateful that hasn’t happened yet, but if it does, God still loves me and values me! What an wonderful thought!

If you feel tense thinking of not accomplishing something or not coming through for someone or not “performing,” be assured God’s love for you has not diminished. But your tension could be revealing that those things are more important than God’s value of you and His love. 

Think about that and let God’s Spirit speak to you according to His will. If it seems applicable, you can repent and ask God for forgiveness that you are not trusting in His view of you, and declaring your own value–based in “rubbish”! Then you can surrender by saying something like, “Even if I don’t _______ (perform? accomplish? please others?), I’ll surrender and affirm God loves me regardless.”

What joy and freedom to reject toxicity!

(photo by Mark Miller)